Dad encouraged me last night by saying this:
God promises that He will never give us anything we can't handle. Truth? Yes.
So, if that's the case, then He actually TRUSTS us with situations..So if I look at my life and think "wow...it's like I have problem after problem!" That's more like God saying "yeah, you do have problem after problem. But you're strong enough to handle it. I trust you with these situations to do the right thing."
So that's encouraging, especially because for me, it literally is like problem after problem. Issue after issue, and I can't confront the person I need to confront for another few months because IF I did, I would make things harder on myself.
(Only three or four people know of this particular situation..)
But even after these encouraging words, I can't help but think, especially as I scroll down facebook, "wow...you guys are so incredibly lucky...you're going to State in 4 different events, you're hanging out with your boyfriend/girlfriend without anyone breathing down your back, you can speak your mind freely, you don't live like you're walking on egg shells, you don't worry about some of the things I have to worry about, you never, EVER had to live through most of the things I've been forced to live through, you are not injured and still hurting over things that happened a year ago..."
the list goes on and on. And I understand that I don't know everything about everyone. Everyone has their own little secrets. Cool.
I know I have victory. I know my enemy will be my footstool, I know they will have to watch me feast and they won't get any of the good food I get, I know I will be blessed, I know I will have peace and that justice in this situation will take place. And I know for a fact that in the next few years, the decisions that they are making now is going to come back and bite them right in the butt. And it's going to hurt like crazy. But that is what they're basically on their knee's begging for..
I know I've already been through a crap-load of stuff! I know I already have an awesome testimony about things that have just gone right for me. I am thankful for all of this.
But I'm still staring this battle down. I'm still having to deal with stuff I shouldn't have to deal with! And the fact that God trusts me with this is cool...but that doesn't mean I take pleasure in dealing with all of this. I'm currently doing better...I don't cry EVERY day. Probably every other day now.
This situation is teaching me some things too. Maybe that's what God's doing here...
1) I'm not here to kiss up to people's buttholes who think they are gods. THEY are the ones at fault here and if THEY don't take correction, if THEY aren't being convicted then that's their own problem.
2) It's taught me how to look for the fruits of the Spirit. And to not be extremely surprised when you DON'T find them.
3) It's really taught me to not get bitter and to forgive and not think "b*tch.." every time one particular name comes up.
4) Keeping a humble, teachable spirit will keep people from thinking "B*tch.." about me. ;) To not insist that I'm always right and to take correction.
5) It's taught me how to stand. and when I can't stand anymore, to continue to stand.
6) It's taught me to completely IGNORE what people think or say about me. What the heck does it matter anyway? Am I really going to let one person's stupid, unlearned opinion about me matter? no. Am I going to find beauty in myself and encourage myself in that? yes...
7) It's taught me discretion on how to handle immature people. Yes, I AM saying that I am more mature than the other person involved. And I say this without shame, and I'm not bragging. It's just true.
8) It's taught me how to view the situation from the other person's perspective, as twisted and wrong as it is.
9) It's taught me to not trust a living soul out there. I trust the people closely surrounding me, but no one else. And that's perfectly fine and healthy.
10) and it's teaching me how to beef up and correctly confront the other person involved. This has not taken place, neither will it for a few more months, but that's my exact point. correct confrontation is confrontation with the right words, the right attitude, and the right timing. And in some cases, with the right witnesses.
I view my life as an accelerated version as everyone else's life. If you knew some of the things I've dealt with and lived through, you would agree. I've matured far faster than a lot of people. Everyone is always going to think that I am too young for what I'm trying to accomplish. But that's okay. God knows I'm ready for what I'm battling or going for. If you think I'm too young for the things I'm doing then take it up with God. :P
God promises that He will never give us anything we can't handle. Truth? Yes.
So, if that's the case, then He actually TRUSTS us with situations..So if I look at my life and think "wow...it's like I have problem after problem!" That's more like God saying "yeah, you do have problem after problem. But you're strong enough to handle it. I trust you with these situations to do the right thing."
So that's encouraging, especially because for me, it literally is like problem after problem. Issue after issue, and I can't confront the person I need to confront for another few months because IF I did, I would make things harder on myself.
(Only three or four people know of this particular situation..)
But even after these encouraging words, I can't help but think, especially as I scroll down facebook, "wow...you guys are so incredibly lucky...you're going to State in 4 different events, you're hanging out with your boyfriend/girlfriend without anyone breathing down your back, you can speak your mind freely, you don't live like you're walking on egg shells, you don't worry about some of the things I have to worry about, you never, EVER had to live through most of the things I've been forced to live through, you are not injured and still hurting over things that happened a year ago..."
the list goes on and on. And I understand that I don't know everything about everyone. Everyone has their own little secrets. Cool.
I know I have victory. I know my enemy will be my footstool, I know they will have to watch me feast and they won't get any of the good food I get, I know I will be blessed, I know I will have peace and that justice in this situation will take place. And I know for a fact that in the next few years, the decisions that they are making now is going to come back and bite them right in the butt. And it's going to hurt like crazy. But that is what they're basically on their knee's begging for..
I know I've already been through a crap-load of stuff! I know I already have an awesome testimony about things that have just gone right for me. I am thankful for all of this.
But I'm still staring this battle down. I'm still having to deal with stuff I shouldn't have to deal with! And the fact that God trusts me with this is cool...but that doesn't mean I take pleasure in dealing with all of this. I'm currently doing better...I don't cry EVERY day. Probably every other day now.
This situation is teaching me some things too. Maybe that's what God's doing here...
1) I'm not here to kiss up to people's buttholes who think they are gods. THEY are the ones at fault here and if THEY don't take correction, if THEY aren't being convicted then that's their own problem.
2) It's taught me how to look for the fruits of the Spirit. And to not be extremely surprised when you DON'T find them.
3) It's really taught me to not get bitter and to forgive and not think "b*tch.." every time one particular name comes up.
4) Keeping a humble, teachable spirit will keep people from thinking "B*tch.." about me. ;) To not insist that I'm always right and to take correction.
5) It's taught me how to stand. and when I can't stand anymore, to continue to stand.
6) It's taught me to completely IGNORE what people think or say about me. What the heck does it matter anyway? Am I really going to let one person's stupid, unlearned opinion about me matter? no. Am I going to find beauty in myself and encourage myself in that? yes...
7) It's taught me discretion on how to handle immature people. Yes, I AM saying that I am more mature than the other person involved. And I say this without shame, and I'm not bragging. It's just true.
8) It's taught me how to view the situation from the other person's perspective, as twisted and wrong as it is.
9) It's taught me to not trust a living soul out there. I trust the people closely surrounding me, but no one else. And that's perfectly fine and healthy.
10) and it's teaching me how to beef up and correctly confront the other person involved. This has not taken place, neither will it for a few more months, but that's my exact point. correct confrontation is confrontation with the right words, the right attitude, and the right timing. And in some cases, with the right witnesses.
I view my life as an accelerated version as everyone else's life. If you knew some of the things I've dealt with and lived through, you would agree. I've matured far faster than a lot of people. Everyone is always going to think that I am too young for what I'm trying to accomplish. But that's okay. God knows I'm ready for what I'm battling or going for. If you think I'm too young for the things I'm doing then take it up with God. :P
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